Episode 49: Weaponized Incompetence
Content note: this episode discusses emotional abuse, controlling relationship dynamics, and burnout. If you feel controlled or unsafe in a relationship, you are not alone.
US: National Domestic Violence Hotline, 1-800-799-7233,or text START to 88788.
You ask someone to do a task they have done before, and it goes wrong every time, until you give up and do it yourself.
That loop has a name: weaponized incompetence.
Greg, Rich, and Sarah define what it is, and what it is not, then work through four scenarios that get more complicated with every detail.
In this episode:• What weaponized incompetence is, and why deliberateness is the dividing line• When it is NOT the answer: ADHD, brain injury, anxiety, learned helplessness, and real skill gaps• The one test that cuts through it: is the person suffering from the avoidance, or benefiting from it?• The health cost of being the one who always notices, plans, and follows through• One honest question to carry into your own week
Chapters:00:00 Welcome and what weaponized incompetence is02:00 When it is not weaponized incompetence03:00 The numbers and the history05:00 Roundtable: what it is and what it is not07:00 Why people keep doing it10:00 What it looks like at home and at work15:00 Learned helplessness vs strategic evasion16:00 The real health cost, and how to address it19:00 Four paradigm-shifting scenarios31:00 What’s on your heart this week35:00 Summary, challenge, and the support groups
This episode featured Greg Shaw with co-hosts Rich and Sarah.
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